Compassionate Leadership

Such powerful words. I’ve been using them for a lifetime. Turns out, I did not understand the essence of their meaning. And when it comes to building teams and being a good leader, the difference can be substantial.

There are four words that we often use interchangeably: pity, sympathy, empathy and compassion.

When people hurt, we feel for them. That’s a pity. In practical terms, pity is seen as a negative. When we pity ourselves, or have a “pity party,” we’re likely in a place of disempowerment.  When others express pity, it can evoke feelings of superiority, condescension or contempt.

When we acknowledge someone’s pain, we are expressing sympathy. We’re letting them know that we are aware of their situation, commiserating their misfortune. When we express sympathy, it helps us connect with people. It’s important as leaders and colleagues to express sympathy at times of loss or pain. People appreciate it.

To connect with someone during a painful time in their life, we express empathy, which is the capacity to imagine being in someone else’s situation. As president, Bill Clinton famously said, “I feel your pain.” It means, “I’ve been there. I know this place. I can feel it.” As leaders or teammates, we connect more deeply when we’re empathetic. It’s a powerful way to build trust and deepen relationships. And when we express that “we know how you feel” idea, it can backfire. No two individuals share the same experience, no matter how similar the situations might seem. My loss of a loved one is different from yours. And letting people know you’ve felt similar pain is always a good thing.

To connect with people’s pain and help them do and feel better, that’s compassion. It’s the feeling that arises when you are confronted with another’s suffering and feel motivated to relieve that suffering.

As leaders and teammates—at home and at work—we need to avoid pity, but instead express sympathy, feel empathy and collaborate with compassion. Helping people achieve success—and overcoming obstacles—is true leadership. ♦

Stephen Garber is director of Third Level Ltd. Contact him at 561.752.5505 or sgarber@thirdlevel.com.

You May Also Like
Notary Tops the List of Florida’s Dream Jobs 

Notary work surges in Florida as real estate dominates nationwide.

Read More
La Boulangerie Boul’Mich Celebrates Its New Kendall Location

Bringing its signature Latin-European flavors to Kendall, the beloved bakery and café marks the occasion with a grand opening celebration on Wednesday, February 19, 2025.

Read More
CityPlace Doral Debuts Three New Retailers 

CityPlace Doral welcomes Escapology, OAKBERRY and Petricor.

Read More
Escapology, OAKBERRY, and Petricor have recently opened at CityPlace Doral.
The Best States for a Fresh Start in The U.S.

Cost of living, job opportunities, and quality of life impacted Florida’s ranking.

Read More
Cost of living, job opportunities, and quality of life impacted Florida's ranking.
Other Posts
Back at the Helm: Let’s Do This!

What’s old is new again.

Read More
Gary Press
Fiorucci Joins Winterfest for Joyful Holiday Celebration

Celebrate the event with family and friends.

Read More
Winterfest
Editor’s Letter: Seasonal Relief Is On the Way

The rebirth of Pier Sixty-Six Resort and Marina will pay dividends to the local economy.

Read More
Kevin Gale
David Posnack Jewish Community Center and Sam Berman Charitable Foundation Partner to Launch Overlap Program

The two-year initiative aims to combat hate and discover common ground through culture and community.

Read More
Jewish Community Center